I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
