Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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