He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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