whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
