i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
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He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
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I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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