He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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