Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I deserve this hangover.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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