I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Drunk is not a location!
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
