She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
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