Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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