You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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