You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
