Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
