the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
