Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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