that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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