yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
