Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
