if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
