By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Omg I joined a choir last night...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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