everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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