My hair reeks of homosexuality.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
