Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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