you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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