I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
