Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize