So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
This is classic penis vs brain.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
