I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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