i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
