Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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