Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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