If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
