I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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