My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
