after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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