hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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