She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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