He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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