So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize