I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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