Texts From Last Night

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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.

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  (615): Tell your boobs to stop staring at me. http://tfl.nu/zl8p
  Replies (30) Good night (5213) Bad night (680)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.

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  (540): I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it. http://tfl.nu/dv65
  Replies (45) Good night (10987) Bad night (2585)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave

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  (203): he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave http://tfl.nu/v07m
  Replies (45) Good night (5556) Bad night (802)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.

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  (732): i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry. http://tfl.nu/ss0l
  Replies (13) Good night (8631) Bad night (870)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Well how do you think I feel

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  fair enough

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  (860): Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate (401): Well how do you think I feel (860): fair enough http://tfl.nu/zhgr
  Replies (39) Good night (9540) Bad night (803)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy

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  (512): He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy http://tfl.nu/obh2
  Replies (6) Good night (1464) Bad night (3303)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.

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  (508): My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life. http://tfl.nu/p0ex
  Replies (16) Good night (5773) Bad night (1475)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.

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  (586): If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday. http://tfl.nu/9are
  Replies (26) Good night (4336) Bad night (1067)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight

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  (336): I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight http://tfl.nu/7krg
  Replies (8) Good night (964) Bad night (3469)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?

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  (520): just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet? http://tfl.nu/osm2
  Replies (3) Good night (3684) Bad night (847)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.

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  (709): i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk. http://tfl.nu/5r6v
  Replies (4) Good night (2647) Bad night (1033)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  #1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home

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  (859): #1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home http://tfl.nu/wpbx
  Replies (16) Good night (3357) Bad night (952)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.

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  (336): He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one. http://tfl.nu/csjr
  Replies (10) Good night (1252) Bad night (4820)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.

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  (253): I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina. http://tfl.nu/kt7p
  Replies (10) Good night (563) Bad night (946)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.

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  (304): I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol. http://tfl.nu/oqf8
  Replies (0) Good night (296) Bad night (198)

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