And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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