she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
soo... how was my night?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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