you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
