Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
