Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
