My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize