just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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