I can't watch pbs sober anymore
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
