he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
